but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
