i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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