sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
