she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
