I heard we made out
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
