I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize