I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Randomize