I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
they need to just BURY HIM!
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
