Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
