my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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