i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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