Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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