Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Randomize
