Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
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It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
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my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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