But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I take back everything I said about communal showers
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize