your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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