My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
