I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
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