I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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