I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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