tell your sister to shave her snatch
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize