Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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