Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
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