sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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