I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
then he tried to convert me to islam
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
