I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
