So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Randomize
