I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize