barbara walters just said penis...
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
