Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
