have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I want to fling myself into the sun
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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