I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
