Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
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