help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My day in three words: secret purse cake
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Randomize
