ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara