in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
she peed on how many people?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
