but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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