She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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