"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize