okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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