my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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