She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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