i think my tv is drunk
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize