I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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