chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
