He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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