so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Randomize
