Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
There are leaves in my underwear?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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