that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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