Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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