shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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