well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
The air was thick with penises
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize